Staying in touch with Friends

During a time of unemployment it's a great idea to let friends and family know that you are looking for a new position. Have the "elevator" speech ready for everyone you meet as one never knows who may have the next lead.

With that in mind, I got a call from John T who is a friend of mine from high school days and college. He lives in New Jersey, which is where we went to high school, Somerville to be exact. He was one of the main reasons I went to Clemson. He was already there one year and I worked with him over the summer of his freshman year at a landscape shop. There are many stories from that summer working there, but I'll leave that to another day.

John called me in response to a you tube video I sent him. You may enjoy this, it will at least get you thinking. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtjfMjjce2Y    So John called and we talked about college, his work in the building industry there in New Jersey and what I was doing to find new work.

                        We both went to Clemson. From where I lived,  it was a college some 17 hours away by car, over night by train and many hours to fly to Greenville and then drive to Clemson. It was a college I knew I couldn't get home from on a weekend, it would be a new beginning fro me. As a Freshman, we were all treated to being a RAT, which meant that our hair was trimmed to a burr cut and we wore an orange beanie. Every upper classman could order you around and we had to do ridiculous stuff, especially in the cafeteria.
For example, when you set down to eat a meal someone would tell you to get on the table and start a specific football cheer. This meant you first needed to know the cheer and second you had to humiliate yourself in from of those eating.  The other Rats had to cheer with you, but you were usually  alone on the table if you were the first to be seen. Imagine every day going to eat and being harassed while you ate. One of the worst for me and I think the last was when I was told to ask a fellow female Rat to marry me. I had to go to her table, get on one knee and loudly ask her to marry me. " Will you marry me?" She just looks embarrassed and won't respond.  Louder Rat some upper class man would yell!"  "WILL YOU MARRY ME?" Again she is laughing and just looking, I said, "Look this isn't real, just say yes so I can eat and leave," she said "yes."  There were cheers and then some other Rat had to lead a cheer.

I said it was my last as I learned to eat in the line as I got food off the display line. That way I had eaten by the time I was at the end of the line and paid. I walked to the return tray line, placed the try there and left.  I did that for about five weeks.  Of course this didn't get you out of walking along the edge of the side walk to class, having to lead a cheer somewhere in the dorms, etc. Needless to say it was about six weeks of hell, unless you knew an upper class man who took care of you.

This brings me back to John T, my friend from  summer work and I should mention the older brother of my best friend in high school.

I was walking down his dorm hall way on the way to my room and he saw me. "Hey Rat," he said with a laugh.  "What are you up to,? he asked. " I headed to my room, why?  Whacha need?"   "Run to the canteen and get me something to eat,"  he said with a big smile.  "Are you kidding me,...okay, what do you want," I added with a friendly voice knowing I would have to run anyway or the other guys sitting around would start in on me. "Get me some fries, a coke and a fur burger, with no ketchup," he added.   "What the heck is a fur burger?" I asked.  "It's their specialty at the Canteen, get on for yourself if  you want, here's some money," he said handing me a ten dollar bill.  Looking at him to see if he was Sh*ting me, I took the money and was off.

I went to the Canteen which was always busy. It was a small restaurant on the lower floor of the quadrangle and usually packed with students getting something late to eat.  I work my way to the front of the line, standing there in a loud mass of freshman and upper class man ordering. I scan the wall menu quickly, but the guy asks me what do I want to order.  Slowly I say, "Fries, a coke," and still scanning I don't see it but I say loudly, "and a fur burger."

The guy taking the order started to laugh, "I have waited two weeks for someone to come in and order this," the crowd go a little quiet and then started to laugh too,  "The Rat wants a fur burger," some unknown voice repeated. What was a cackle of ordering sounds became a burst of laughter and I was the reason.  "I didn't think there was really one, but I was told to order it, give me a  regular burger then," I asked.  "What is a fur burger?" I added.   Still laughing, the attendant said it a burger with pubic hair on it.  "Well that's disgusting." I said with a red face I am sure.

Needless to say I was embarrased and I couldn't believe John had betrayed my trust. When I say him, he was standing in the hall talking with someone. He saw me and started to laugh, "Did you get the fur burger?"  I wasn't laughing, I was embarrassed and tossed him the food and kept walking.

When John and talked on the phone this time we laugh about it. He said in retrospect he felt like he had betrayed my trust, but he was still OK with it since it was Rat season. I agreed, with him. It was funny and I think I could have taken the joke better. It was all part of the experience of starting college and the whole process of being a Rat, made you part of the brotherhood of being a Clemson man.

Staying in touch with your friends during a difficult time is a great way to keep your spirits up. I try to call a friend  every week or two. We always end up laughing about the good old days.

$$